Ah, my precious computer... *clutches tightly* How I've missed thee... but there are posts to respond to...
QUOTE:
It's admirable that one can admit to being so quite and shy. Remaining in the shadows all the time. I still do that. I'm trying my best to open up more...but I know that no matter what...there are some personality traits that are meant to be...and some that are meant to change with time.
I look forward to the event. Probably the most social event I've been to in over a decade.
Well, there's a triangle of problems I see within myself that keep this shell reinforced. My shyness I've already addressed. The other 2, depression and isolationism, keep the shell strong. If I can remove any one of these points, it breaks the triangle, therefore cracking my shell, as what's left is a line, which has no area to hold me. (And let's avoid the technicalities of an egg being spherical with volume, okay?) I don't expect to be able to get rid of all 3, but I do need one of them to change.
As for cons, though, they really are my only time to socialize in person. Something about a con keeping me running and keeps my head up in cloud 9, and I'm happy. Hence, no depression, and I'm more willing to be open at cons, knowing that everyone there has something in common with me- and it's something I like. (The isolationism though, means I'll be damned if I know how to start a conversation...) Cons are a vacation for me; I can throw away who I am for real, and bring out part of my online persona, which I vastly prefer to the me outside of the con.
Unfortunately, after this move, if I've not already said it, my odds of getting out there this year have been set in place to be 0%. As things are now, even Otakon is going to be barely affordable, and this is even after negotiating with some people in the area to remove both the travel and hotel costs from the budget. If I go a full year without a con (since last Yaoicon was the last con I've been to), well, let's just say that my viper's tongue will come out, and it will be VERY sharp. No vaca makes me very grumpy...
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